2026 January 27 Choosing your friends

Hi, this is Jim Cranston from 7EveryMinute and 7EveryMinute.com, the podcast and website about reimagining your life. Thanks for joining me today to talk about choosing your friends. So let's get started. If you like what you hear today, please leave a like, subscribe, tell your friends, and send me a message.

This week we're going to talk about who your friends really are. We're talking about who's in your inner circle, who do you spend the most time with, who do you confide in, who do you take advice from, and who do you let help shape your opinion of other people and world events. Because according to many pundits and influencers, these are the people who you will most likely tend to act like and become more like them.

And so shockingly, in these modern times, these friends may not actually be people at all. Well then who are they? Well, they're the algorithms behind social media feeds, the program directors at the radio or TV station that you listen to. It might be Sam Altman of OpenAI, which is ChatGPT, or Mark Zuckerberg of Meta, Facebook, and Instagram, or who knows who sets the direction of TikTok. Could be anybody.

Because these days, even older generations are spending one to one and a half hours a day on social media, and over 11% of Baby Boomers are using AI on a daily basis. Since AI is heavily influenced by all the available information, those same sources we just mentioned, all the social media and public media, they're influencing AI as well.

It's also estimated that up to 40% of Gen Xers and Baby Boomers use AI as a companion or friend, plus specific applications are being developed to help older adults avoid loneliness. Now go back and think about who your circle of influential friends is, but perhaps you may need to include one or more technology friends with whom some people are spending upwards of four hours a day.

That doesn't mean that you're automatically believing everything you see or hear, but because of the biases of the feed algorithms, it probably does mean that you may be living in a bit of an echo chamber, and it's probably coupled with being fed particularly upsetting news that confirms your bias in order to keep you engaged. Neither of which really help you develop a balanced life view.

This isn't a criticism at all, but a wake-up call. Because now we have social media and public media that's gone from being a source of information and entertainment to something that's highly shaping our opinions and worldview. Couple that with the increasing usage of AI, and many people are inadvertently giving these kind of semi-social relationships pretty significant places in their influential circle of friends.

Additionally, many people are forming these kind of parasocial relationships with various influencers and personalities, and that's becoming even more common with AI. In all these cases, people are feeling attached to someone or something who is not individually aware that any particular person is their follower, but they still exert great influence over their followers' feelings and beliefs. This is not a good thing.

So what do we do about it? Because the problem is when it gets so commonplace, all these sorts of person-to-thing interactions start to seem normal, but it isn't normal. It isn't normal to act like people vying for attention on social media, and it's not normal for every reported event to be presented with a slant that always aligns with one point of view. And if you're exposing yourself to this regularly and treating these sources as kind of a trusted friend who gives you good information, it suddenly becomes clearer why much of society is becoming more isolated and polarized.

So how do we take this back and get control of it again? Well, obviously, the obvious thing is to cut back and be more critical of what you're consuming, especially with the advent of advanced AI image generation and manipulation. Always be cautious of believing what you see or hear or read. But the best thing probably is to talk to other people and don't just reference the same news sources. Look for different viewpoints. Read the news from another country. Talk to people from other places. Have discussions. Have disagreements. That's right, disagree on some topics, but then talk them through. Understand what the other person is saying and try to come to a real understanding between the two of you, even if not total agreement.

But the most important part of it is to realize that indeed your friends really do have a big influence on how you see the world in every situation. And for that reason, be careful who you let into your close circle of friends. In most cases, it should really be only people and not people substitutes like AI chatbots and influencer personalities. Both are great for entertainment and perhaps some basic information, but they aren't so great when their actual personalities and goals can't be discovered.

So that's it for the evening. Your homework is to think about how much social and public media you actually consume, and if it's all from one perspective or multiple perspectives. Extra points if you'll also notice whether any opposing views are presented or if it's only one side of every story.

Good luck. As always, remember one of the best ways to care for yourself is to care for others. UKR7.com for ways to help the people of Ukraine, WCK.org for World Central Kitchen. Those are both international sites, plus there are lots of local charities, and even just a simple smile can change someone else's day for the better in ways you can't even imagine.

As always, thank you for stopping by. If you found something interesting or useful, please pass it along, and please subscribe and hit that like button. And if not, please drop me a comment as to what you'd like to hear. Have a great week. Remember to live the life that you dreamed of, because that's the path to true contentment. Love, and encouragement to everyone. See you next week on 7EveryMinute and 7EveryMinute.com.